


Fun and Games

by icaruslaughed



Series: Suptober20 [12]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Ouch, dean's in hell and sam's lost it, have fun, post- season 3 finale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:46:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27019771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icaruslaughed/pseuds/icaruslaughed
Summary: day 14 of suptober, set just after the season 3 finale
Series: Suptober20 [12]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1955047
Comments: 4
Kudos: 5





	Fun and Games

Sam scoops his older brother up into his arms the same way Dean used to when he fell asleep on the couch. In those brief moments, he almost always woke up but pretended to still be sleeping. He didn’t know why he did it. Maybe because he was scared Dean would drop him and pretend to be tough and cool again, maybe he’d put back on the mask that Sam wished he never felt the need to wear in the first place. In those moments, he felt the most cared for he ever felt in his life, asleep and safe in his brother’s loving arms.

That’s why he holds Dean like this now, so that when he wakes up, he’ll feel just as safe as Sam did all those years ago. When he wakes up, he’ll try to shove Sam away of course, pretending to be a Real Man as their dad trained him to be, but Sam will just hold him tighter. He’ll hold his brother so, so tight when he wakes up. He _will_ wake up. He has to wake up because this can’t be happening. He lived a hundred Tuesdays just so this wouldn’t happen, which means it can’t happen now. It can’t.

Blood from the giant gashes stains his shirt but Sam can’t find it in himself to care because this _is_ happening. Back when they were still kids, when they found themselves messing with things they shouldn’t be, their dad would come home and say “ _It’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt_ .” They listened back then. He wishes Dean had listened now. Hunters aren’t supposed to make deals with the creatures they hunt, certainly not demons. If Dean had taken his own goddamn life more seriously, then maybe, _maybe_ , he wouldn’t be in this mess right now.

He carries Dean’s body to the Impala, still expecting him to wake up because this must just be another one of the nightmares he has about this day but if it’s a nightmare then why does the blood on his hands feel so _real_ ? Doing his best to keep the leather clean of blood, he eases Dean into the backseat and slams the door behind him. He tries not to, oh does he try, but he’s _pissed_. He’s pissed at the demons for existing, he’s pissed at Ruby for not helping more, he’s pissed at his brother for making the stupid ass deal, and he’s pissed at himself for letting this happen at all.

He’s so mad at everything right now that it’s almost funny. He tips his head back and laughs into the dead of this awful night. He laughs like a maniac, the bitter kind of laugh that you only ever hear when someone is at their breaking point and it's either that or lose their mind completely. 

Sam doesn’t know how long it’s been since he walked out of that house, but it’s probably time to call Bobby, or that’s what the rational part of his brain tells him. So he does. Next he should get into the car and drive to Bobby’s. Then they’ll give Dean a proper hunter’s burial. “ _No, we can’t do that, because how will he wake up if we burn his body? He’ll wake up._ ” They can at least give him a funeral.

“Fun and games,” he laughs bitterly, “It was never fun and games.” But Lord knows they got hurt.


End file.
